All Smiles

The last two days have been in the gutter. With too many reasons to explain it made me feel physically sick. I felt like those people in the cymbalta commercial. Sometimes it's tough being a girl. I had my mom come get me from school on Thursday I felt so sick. Since then I felt like at any second I would snap.
But I've had a change of heart.
This morning I woke up same as ever. Headache and stomach ache. I had slept on the couch and I was awaken to the T.V. I rolled around for awhile before I realized the remote was without an owner and I turned to a channel other than Cartoon Network. I watched a clutter show and then a movie. My dad told me to go get dressed and that he didn't care I was watching a show. I was so upset. But it was 12:40. So I decided to hurry and get dressed during commercials so that maybe I could finish my show. Once it was over I decided to do something for the family.
I asked my dad what he would rather I do, tackle the pee smelling bathroom or the dishes and clutter covered kitchen. He said kitchen. So I plugged my nose and started the dishes. There was some food in the tupperware and let me tell you, it STUNK. Cantaloupe molding, refried beans that nobody could remember opening, and baby bottle milk all contributed to the smell. But I got it done. Then I bleached out the sink and I wiped down the counter. Even though my brother moaned the whole time while putting away the dishes I was feeling a little better.
I then walked over to the piano and started to play. I practiced "I Stand all Amazed", "My Heart Will Go On" and "Music of the Night". Nothing made be feel as good as the hymn though. I played it seven times through. Then, resting my fingers before I wear them out I started playing with Ande. She makes me smile, I just can't help it. I love her sooo much. Well, after dancing with her to Pandora's mix of songs, I feel a lot better. So good in fact, I decided to tire out my fingers again and blog about it.
Who would've thought I'd be happy today? Maybe I don't need to worry so much about friends and just listen to music, dance with Ande, improve my piano skills and serve my family.

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)


**There was going to be a picture but thanks to my computer, and 1 hour of waiting for the box to pop up, I decided to go without it**

My Beautiful Sister

Ande and her usual attitudeSniffing a FlowerLaughing at Chloe, for some reason she can't hold

a straight face with her around.

Her hair that will finally go in a cute ponytail

Her pretty smile

I love her. I can't believe how patient

she was, letting me take her pictures.

The Simple Things

Yesterday I put some shoes on Ande and we headed out. She wanted to walk too so I let her hold my hand. Immediately she had a favorite hand and finger. My ring finger, on my left hand.

I loved walking and listening to her gibberish, pretending I knew what she was talking about. I loved seeing her face light up as she looked into the sky and saw bats. When I explained to her what they were she copied me "at at ats". I loved her smile as she occasionally looked up at me. The warmth of my heart as she said "thank you" with the smiles. I loved the expression on her face as she saw a flower and raced over to smell it. How she lifted her hands ever so carefully to pull it to her face, but not hard enough to break it off the stem.

I loved how every time she heard a dog her hand would go to her mouth in shock, she would look at me, then "woof". She would then look around saying "oggy, oggy, oggy". I loved the air that was just perfect. Like there was no temperature perfect. I laughed as I smelled the manure smell from the farm up the road that I have grown up with. I loved feeling the warmth of her hand on my finger as I realized we were going far for a little girl on foot. But the lovingness I felt when I went to pick her up and carry her home and she said "No, No". As we turned around to head back around the block she cried. But realized, we got to see everything we had seen before again. How happy I was that we got to see it all again!

And the tears that came to surface when she saw our house a block down and she started crying and trying to turn around while saying, "No, home please, NO NOO!"